Holding yourself together has long been a private duty, and a private failure when it slips. That obligation is coming apart. Ways to remain steady under pressure are being designed into classrooms, workplaces, and even chambers of power. Before long, expecting people to cope alone will look like gross civic negligence.

→ Sitting with a calm person slows your own breathing and heart rate, an effect called "co-regulation."

→ Schools are replacing detention with rooms for breathing and movement, treating bad behavior as stress rather than rule-breaking.

→ Talented leaders can no longer excuse a bad temper in the office; staying calm is now part of the job qualification.

→ EU politicians are being led through breathing exercises to calm a room before hard debates.